This time last year, I was a couple of weeks into building my own new habits. Unlike most people, I didn’t start 2021 with a resolution.

Instead, I started it bitter and depressed. Like many of you, the pandemic really affected my mental state and overall wellness.

To be honest, my loss of self and depression started before the pandemic. I even went to the doctor about it but instead of trying to help me with my mental health – she fat-shamed me and said she wouldn’t help me with my mental state until I went home and lost weight.

But the story of my anxiety & stay at home Mom depression is a long story for another time. Just know that I hadn’t been feeling great about myself for a long time.

Last February, I woke up one day and realized that I had to change for my kids. Needing to change for myself wasn’t enough motivation. It had gotten me nowhere in years.

Due to the pandemic, I was homeschooling my kindergartener and my second grader was doing virtual schooling. So they were with me again all day, every day. And I realized that they were watching me fall apart.

This one random February day, I looked at my boys and knew that I needed to take better care of myself so that I could take better care of them and provide a better example for them.

So I decided to start a new, healthier lifestyle. Physical and mental.

It wasn’t about losing weight.

I knew if I went into it with goals to lose a certain amount of weight, I would never succeed. I struggled with eating disorders in the past and I knew that if I focused on weight, it could be dangerous.

I spent almost all of high school with a secret eating disorder and even struggled with it some in young adulthood.

Plus, my PCOS makes weight loss difficult and I knew that being healthy was more than a number and wasn’t the right focus for me.

So unlike all of my previous journeys, I decided to set a goal to live an overall healthier lifestyle.

I didn’t want this to be a thing I did to just lose weight and then stop when I hit my weight goal. I wanted to create a lifestyle that I could maintain for the rest of my days.

I also knew I didn’t want to do a drastic diet and lose weight quickly that I would just gain back months later. That was what I had done before and I didn’t want to fail at keeping it off again.

So a healthier lifestyle was my goal.

And here I am over a year later and I am still going strong with my new healthier lifestyle habits.

So how did I do it? Here is my plan in action based on the tips I suggested in the e-mail.

Setting Actionable Steps

First, I started out by creating actionable steps. If you check out my goal planning sheets, you’ll see the sheets I used to plan out my new habits.

I am also using parts of my Wellness Planner for my journey. You can see a flip-through of the pages here – Wellness Planner Flip-Through. Get it 40% off with the code: WELLNESS2022

I selected my main goal and then I came up with ACTIONABLE steps.

I started out with a few steps and then added more and modified them over time.

You’ll need to modify your steps to maintain whatever habit you are creating.

My actionable steps were/are:

1) Get up Early and Exercise

I started out by riding my exercise bike for 20 minutes every day.

But then I upped my goal to 30 minutes a day.

After 7 months of only biking, my sister convinced me to add in strength training.

I now exercise for 50+ minutes 6 days a week. I do 30 minutes on my bike and use the Peleton digital app strength training classes.

**If you want to try out the app, Use this link to get a Free 60 Day Guest Pass for the digital app. It’s my sister’s guest pass link that earns you a 60-day free trial instead of just the 30-day trial you get when you download the app.

I loosely follow #Hardcore on the Floor calendar for strength training. It’s a wonderful Facebook group that my sister introduced me to where a generous woman named Nicole Gonzalez creates a FREE workout calendar for the digital app.

2) Shower, put on make up, and do my hair each morning

This may sound crazy to be a goal for many of you. BUT, that is how depressed I had gotten. After staying home non-stop for months, I had stopped basic care of myself. Even taking a shower each day was a struggle.

Taking a shower, putting on makeup, and doing my hair make me feel better. I feel more put together and ready to take on the day than when I don’t do it.

I fully admit, that after a really bad haircut (that I am trying to grow out), I actually only put on make-up each day and throw my hair into a ponytail. But hopefully, when my hair grows back out, I can go back to styling it as well each day.

3) Eat healthier meals – NO fad diets

I know this is where I will probably get the most questions. But I don’t have the most detailed answer for it.

I just try to stick to healthier foods. I am not doing Keto, Paleo, etc, BUT I do try to eat higher amounts of protein now that I am strength training. I do still eat carbs and I do still have “cheat” days.

My mindset is that there is no bad food. Instead, I focus on portions of food and how often I eat foods that aren’t as healthy.

I eat a LOT of chicken breast and ground chicken, eggs, cauliflower rice (because I actually love it), vegetables, protein yogurt, apples because they’re my favorite, popcorn as a snack, and I do eat carbs including pasta.

My husband and I didn’t eat out a lot before so that wasn’t a change we had to make. But when we do eat out, unless it’s a special occasion, I try to choose healthier options.

4) Keep to a cleaning schedule

I used to be so good at cleaning my house. But my depression and anxiety made doing anything hard including cleaning regularly.

I decided that part of my wellness journey needed to include the physical space I was living in. Large messes and clutter make my anxiety worse so by not keeping up with a cleaning schedule, I was only creating more anxiety for myself.

I knew that I had to create a cleaning schedule and stick with it so that it wasn’t so overwhelming anymore.

I have these free sheets that can help you make a cleaning plan – https://momenvy.co/free-cleaning-planner-inserts/

I also try to keep up with folding laundry. Laundry has always been a nemesis of mine. Each day, I have a schedule of laundry that I run.

Before, I would just do laundry when the kids were getting low on clothes or hampers were getting full. But this would mean sometimes I would be running 6 loads of laundry in one day. Now, I just do a couple of loads each day and it is so much more manageable.

I also *try* to fold the clothes each night when we have downtime after dinner or my husband and I have TV time.

In addition, I also have been better about making my boys stick to picking up after themselves. This helped keep down on the overall clutter of the house which was becoming overwhelming for me.

5) Think positive thoughts

Now, this one isn’t easy still. I am a naturally glass-half-empty kind of girl. But I am trying really hard to focus on the positives. My planner and journaling really help with staying more positive.

In addition, I have always tried to add music that will help boost my mood. Throughout the month of December, I even had our Alexa set to play Christmas music each morning during our rush to the bus to provide more positive energy for both me and my boys.

6) Nightly Meditation to get Better Sleep

I just started meditating in December. The Peleton app includes meditating so I decided to try it out and I fell in love.

It used to take me HOURS to fall asleep thanks to my anxiety. Now, I am asleep before the meditation is even over.

7) Less Mind-Less Scrolling & Tiktok

This is my newest actionable step. My Tiktok watching and mindless scrolling habit have gotten out of control. So now I am trying to work on lessening my time on devices unless I am being productive. It’s hard when my blog keeps me online so much.

That is it for my actionable steps for now. I know over time they will continue to change and I will add more but these steps are what helps me maintain my healthier lifestyle.

The next important thing to remember about trying to form a new habit is that…

Motivation isn’t Coming

I learned that I was not going to suddenly be motivated. I kept thinking motivation was just going to hit me. So I quickly learned that even when I didn’t want to do it, I had to force myself.

So just do the darn thing – whatever it is. Get up, move your feet, and get it done. You’ll feel better once you do!

Even now, when my 5 am alarm goes off, I groan and want to go right back to sleep. I feel awful but push through anyway.

By the time I am done with my morning routine, I am SO happy that I didn’t just go back to sleep. That feeling is what motivates me to do it again the next day.

WRITE IT DOWN & Track your Progress

So about 6 weeks into my new lifestyle, I started to track my weight and how clothes fit. I still didn’t select a goal weight because I don’t have one. Instead, I just tracked for my own knowledge and information.

I wasn’t sure if I was making progress so I decided that if I tracked my weight, I would know if it was working. I wish that. I had done measurements instead because the scale isn’t the best judge.

With clothing, I picked a pile of clothes to use as a gauge for how my clothes were fitting. It has been exciting to see the difference in how the clothes fit. And even more exciting, to pick out new clothes to gauge my body’s change because the old ones are too big.

I also keep track of the weights that I am lifting in a class. Upping to heavier weights is a huge sign of progress in a strength class.

I keep track of our meals and I also track my cleaning schedule. Trackers are such a great way to monitor your habit and remind yourself of your goals. They’re a visible example of your progress.

Choose your Hard

Being miserable, out of shape, heavier than I would like, having a messy house, looking like I just rolled out of bed are ALL hard. They all made me feel guilt and shame.

Working out, cleaning, putting on makeup, doing my hair, etc. are also all hard.

I choose my hard now. I choose the ones that lead to a happier, healthier, me.

Choose your hard.

It’s Okay to Stumble – Don’t Let it be the Reason you Quit

In the past, if I didn’t work out for a few days or stopped eating healthy for a vacation, I would often give up on my entire health journey. This time, I am making sure that I get right back on my journey.

I went on a week’s vacation, enjoyed holiday baking and eating with my boys, ate birthday cake and ice cream, went to dinners with my husband, and I still return to my “healthier” lifestyle.

Life isn’t perfect. I can’t maintain eating super healthy and perfect every day for the rest of my life. Maybe some people can, but I can’t.

I now live under the idea that it is okay to skip days when you are sick. It is okay to skip days for special occasions. It is okay to not stick to my new healthier guidelines 100% of the time. BUT I am going to get right back to them when those off days go by.

Don’t let the fear of imperfection, keep you from maintaining your goal and new habits.

Wellness Planner

I wanted to share a link for you to get my wellness planner at 40% off. I am using parts of my Wellness Planner for my journey and it has helped me SO much. Get it 40% off with the code: WELLNESS2022

I really have used the reflection pages a lot to journal about my feelings about my journey. I wish I had used the measurement pages but I have only used the weight tracking pages.

When I created this planner, I talked to the user like I was talking to myself. It is so different than your average planner because of this.

SEE A FLIP-THROUGH OF THE WELLNESS PLANNER

Have Questions? E-mailing Me is Best

If you have any more questions, just shoot me an email at: [email protected]. I’ll try my best to be as open and honest as I can be about my journey. If you comment with questions below, I may not be as open as I would be in an e-mail response.